Easter Sunday

Yesterday I was coming out of the airport on the last leg of my trip to see my Mum.   Luton airport is quite a big place and there were a lot of people jostling about.  Suddenly from behind me I heard a high pitched squeal  ' DADDY! '  and a child came charging past me running for all her life.  She was closely followed by a smaller boy who was also yelling ' DADDY DADDY DADDY!'   .  I looked up ahead and there coming towards them and me was a slightly pudgy, slightly bald bespectacled bloke wearing the biggest smile.  The children threw themselves into his arms, and he was almost in tears except that his smile was so wide it wouldnt let him cry.



It reminded me of the closing credits in the film Love Actually - the scene with all the reunions between all the different people at the airport arrival gate.   Id like to think that they actually just filmed real people saying real hellos to their loved ones and not that they were all actors paid to kiss and hug each other .😍




One day, maybe very soon, we are going to find ourselves on the threshold of heaven.  I have no idea what that moment is going to be like, but I do hope it is something like the scene I witnessed yesterday.   I do hope I get to charge towards God with all my might, yelling His name at the top of my voice in unashamed and completely abandoned excitement.  I hope I get to throw myself into His arms and that He picks me up and spins me round and that He is laughing.   And I hope that Jesus is there watching, feeling incredible joy that the sacrifice that He made for me has enabled me to enjoy this amazing moment of homecoming and completion and love.



This is what Easter is all about. 

Thank you Jesus.   

Lent day 46 - Where did He go?

I haven't really given a massive amount of thought to Easter Saturday before.  I suppose I imagined Jesus going down into Satan's territory to take the keys of death and hell from Him ( possibly doing a modicum of gloating whilst Satan was doing a modicum of withering and screeching and despairing).  And then I think I envisaged Jesus toddling off to find those people who drowned in the great flood - who didn't have the time to repent of their sins etc , and Jesus preaching to them and most of them repenting and believing, thereby qualifying them to get to heaven.

But yesterday I did a bit of reading around the whole subject of what Jesus was doing during the day and a half He was dead.  And it appears that it's not quite as simple as I imagined.  😊

There seems to be some debate about the various scriptures which mention Easter Saturday.  There is agreement that the concept of ' hell' is a relatively modern one and that the better translation is that He descended to the place of the dead.  Possibly a ' holding bay' for souls before judgement.   Then some people think that the spirits that he preached to were not people at all but angelic spirits - those angels who fell and intermarried with people around the time of Noah.  And yet others point to the fact that Jesus told the thief on the cross ' Today you will be with me in paradise'  ie  Jesus was in paradise at least on Friday.      It's all very interesting , you should read up on it.

But the thing that I really wanted to know was why did God wait so long to raise Jesus from the dead?   If Jesus was pronounced dead sometime on Friday afternoon and was in a tomb before sun down on Friday evening then why didn't the resurrection happen on Saturday morning?   If you've got the best news in the history of the universe ever why wait an extra 24 hours to deliver it?  If I was God I'd have been itching to play my ace and roll the stone away.

Here's something I read yesterday which sheds a whole new light on the three days.

According to Jewish tradition, a person’s soul/spirit remained with his/her dead body for three days. After three days, the soul/spirit departed. If Jesus’ resurrection had occurred on the same day or even the next day, it would have been easier for His enemies to argue He had never truly died. Significantly, Jesus waited several days after Lazarus had died before He came to resurrect Lazarus so that no one could deny the miracle (John 11:38–44).

I didnt know that that's what Jews believed about death.  It makes perfect sense of the delay in getting to Lazarus and the distress of Mary and Martha ( Lord if you had only come earlier..... even two days after he had died and his soul would still have been here and you could have done something but now it is too late, his spirit has gone)  It also makes perfect sense of the resurrection.  To the Jewish mind by the Sunday Jesus's spirit would have departed and He would have been truly and eternally gone.  A resurrection miracle is only possible when all possible hope of life is completely extinguished.

Three days also fulfilled Biblical prophecy

 He has torn us to pieces but he will heal us; he has injured us but he will bind up our wounds. After two days he will revive us; on the third day he will restore us, that we may live in his presence.  (Hosea 6:2)

Jesus died on the day the Passover Lamb was traditionally slaughtered.  His resurrection happened on the first day of a new week.  Perhaps even in that there is symbolism of the perfect sacrifice leading to a new beginning.

Maybe we wont fully know what it was that Jesus was doing on Easter Saturday and why, until we get to heaven.  All I know is that God never does anything by accident.  There was a perfect reason and purpose behind the ' down time' in the resurrection story.   When it looked to the disciples and the world at large as though nothing was happening there were things of eternal significance going on.  In the moment of greatest despair and hopelessness God was working on His most spectacular move.  Jesus had told His friends what was going to happen but even in the middle of it they couldn't see it and didn't believe it!   The surface looked like death and irreparable tragedy.  Underneath resurrection power was building.

Lent day 45 - suffering

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0xEOy5EC2I

super super tired last night so cheating somewhat and posting this instead of the usual wordy post :)
It is only 5 minutes long.  And really rather beautiful.

lent day 44 - new birth

I was driving past fields of new born lambs yesterday.  The sun was shining.  The grass was green. Daffodils are starting to peek out of the hedgerows.  It's beginning to look alot like springtime 🌞 The whole new birth thing can be a bit of a cliche, but it was on my mind because at the weekend I got to spend a few minutes with a newborn baby who was 5lb 11 at birth and now, two months on is still not quite 9lbs.   He is tiny.  He is still nowhere near the size my three boys were when they were born!

I felt the God thought go through my mind ' the bigger the baby the harder the birth'. 


This was most certainly true for me giving birth to my huge 9 lb 12 boys.  Sam got stuck and had to be yanked out with forceps.  I lost so much blood that I technically should have had a blood transfusion but somehow, thankfully, managed to avoid it by promising to lie still and do nothing for 24 hours.  I wasnt up to doing anything except breathe and look at my baby to be honest.  However having a big baby does have its advantages.  There's a saying in Northern Ireland that big babies come out ' half reared'   😊  My boys all slept and fed well, were robust and not prone to sniffles or wheezes or allergies or infections.  They have all grown from being huge babies to being huge young men with enormous feet and gigantic appetites. 

Im currently working for a charity which has some big dreams.   I go to a church which has big dreams.   Big dreams can be pretty tricky to bring to birth.  The bigger the dream the harder the delivery.   Sometimes it can feel as though the birthing is going to kill you and that neither you or the dream is going to make it out alive.   But God is an excellent midwife.  He hold the times and the seasons in His hands and He was the one who formed the idea and grew it from a tiny seed to something which is ready to take on a life of its own.

I remember my three pregnancies as being times of interminable waiting.  Especially the last couple of weeks.  And the waiting was tinged with both excitement and dread.  I couldn't wait to meet my babies and yet I really didn't want to go through the experience of giving birth ( especially the second time, it having been pretty gruesome the first time round).  It is tiring and boring and frustrating because there is nothing you can do to make it happen any quicker.  You don't sleep much towards the end of a pregnancy.  Sometimes everything aches, you are getting braxton hicks contractions..... its a wonder anyone ever does it more than once!!!


But of course it is all worth it in the end.   So, if you are pregnant with a dream and are waiting, if you are suffering the pain of contractions, if everything is difficult and dangerous and it feels like it is going to kill you - then maybe you are giving birth to a big baby.  A big dream.  Something bigger than you had anticipated or thought possible.  Perhaps when the dream is born it will already be ' half reared' and will need less tender nurturing that you think before it is up and running.

Easter is a time of new life.  Of the impossible becoming possible.  Of resurrection power coming to bring life where there was death and victory where there was apparent defeat.  Lets dream big and not be afraid of the birth process.  If it didn't kill Jesus it won't kill us!

lent day 43 - debates and arguments

I was most heartened yesterday when listening to a debate on radio 4 to hear an audience of young people ( mostly university students I think) talking extremely intelligently about the morals of citizenship.   The arguments went back and forth - is it more important to look after those known to you than strangers? - who is our neighbour? - what is society?  etc.  Each argument had its own inherent logic and was presented clearly and with passion.   It made for good listening and it cheered me to know that critical thinking and debating skills are still alive and kicking in our educational institutions.  And indeed in society at large - whatever you conceive ' society' to be.

It reminded me of my student days.  I was fortunate enough to be a student when we all got grants and there were no fees and nobody ended up with £40k debt.   I did learn lots of useful things from my two degree courses, but what I remember most about those days was sitting up till the wee small hours arguing heatedly with people who had radically different views from mine about all sorts of subjects.  Not only did those discussions help me to realise that not everyone thought like I did, and that some of them might be just as right in their views as I was in mine, but they provided me with some of the enduring friendships of my life.  Learning how to debate, and challenge and be challenged and disagree and yet remain friends is a vital life lesson.  Part of my concern about the increasing cost of a university education is that fewer people will opt to study this way.  And I have no doubt they can learn what they need to learn in better, less expensive and more productive ways in order to get jobs.  But there is something about the community of young thinkers which a university so often is, the space and time it provides for intense and meaningful relationships to develop which is valuable and quite possibly unique.

I remember going to tutorials where we were all supposed to be discussing some principles of economics ( yes I actually studied economics as part of my Management degree - bet you didn't know that eh?) and ending up talking about where the universe was expanding into and if that presupposed the existence of God!  Critical thinking was encouraged and expected and was normal.  Tangents were OK.  Give and take was the order of the day.

Jesus cultivated a community of disciples around Him and challenged their thinking in every conceivable way.  They must have debated and argued and talked and questioned late into the night on many many occasions.  We see in the gospels that the disciples quite often argued amongst themselves and fell out with each other over their differing interpretations of Jesus's teaching.  This is partly because Jesus called twelve people who would never normally have crossed paths, let alone lived in community together.    Somewhat like a cohort in college or uni, the disciples were a diverse bunch.   Mostly in life we tend to congregate round people who are very similar to ourselves.  I know that in higher education we are congregating with people with a similar academic ability to us, but in other ways we are getting to rub alongside people we would not get the chance to meet in any other setting.    Tax collectors and fishermen and doctors and carpenters and women. 

 The disciples theology was dismantled and reconstructed during their three years on the road with Jesus.  Their minds were blown time after time by miracles and parables.   And I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they had many many laughs together because Jesus is the warmest, kindest, funniest , wittiest person ever to have lived.   He knew how to diffuse an argument.   But He seems to have allowed arguments to arise every now and again because theres nothing actually wrong with a bit of healthy debate. 

One of the things which concerns me about the technology generation to which my kids belong is that they might lose the ability to debate and argue and wrestle with ideas in community with others.  If you look to Google for all your answers..... well..... that's a bit depressing isnt it?  And if all your conversation is remotely conducted through screens....  ( says the woman who is talking to her friends via a blog  😉)  If Jesus thought it was important to gather a small, diverse group around Him and talk to them for three years then maybe that dynamic should be important to us too.  It's interesting to note that for all their differences in learning and culture and experience and for all the petty rivalries which had surfaced in the group over the course of three years, when it came to the crunch the disciples stuck together, defended each other, worked as a team and ultimately were prepared to die for their common understanding of who Jesus was.    Their love for Him was greater.  His death and resurrection put all their differences into perspective. 

The lesson for today - get round people who challenge you and make you think. Make sure those people arent all like you.   Embrace difference.   Put down your gadgets and take the time to talk face to face and think out loud.  Dont be afraid to debate and disagree and listen and modify and stand firm and be passionate.  Keep your love for Jesus as the main thing.  And you might just find that together we are all stronger than apart and that the gates of hell will not prevail against us.
                                

Lent day 42 - holy week

 I came across this image earlier in the week and I really really liked it.   How can something as complex as the story of Jesus's last week on earth be expressed so simply and clearly in six little line drawings?  Whoever designed this ( and it doesnt seem to be ascribed to anyone I can discover but it looks like the drawings used in the Good News Bible doesnt it?) has been clever in the details.  I like the fact that the first and last people are dressed in blue.  Celebration and joy.  And the second picture shows Jesus with a purple sash - for royalty.  It is a great thumbnail.  It was a great week.

I dont suppose any of us will ever have a week which starts with the paparazzi following us and the news channels wanting interviews and our fans camping out on the street outside out house just to get a glimpse of us and end with us being sentenced to death.  It's pretty extreme. It must have been bewildering and exhausting for Jesus.  It is tempting to think that because He was God then He was somehow unaffected by the intense emotions of Holy Week.  But He was fully human.  How did He really feel about being paraded into town on Palm Sunday with everyone wanting a piece of Him?  How did He feel about the weight of expectation which was on Him as people clearly hoped and demanded He would overthrow the regime.  How intense was the battle in His head as He wrestled with what He knew God had called Him to do?  How sad did He feel about His beloved disciples that week - knowing that when it came to the crunch they would not be able to stand with Him and that one would ultimately betray Him for money?  How torn did He feel when he realised that His mother would have to watch Him die?  When the crowd were shouting ' Free Bar-Abbas ( free the son of the father) was every fibre in His being longing to shout and yell and tell them they were being blind and misguided?   The emotions of Holy week are super intense.  And all of it was playing out in the heat of the middle east at the height of an occupation.    It can be hard for us to get anywhere close to understanding what it must have been like for Jesus and His disciples from the written accounts over the distance of centuries.

That is one of the reasons that Lent is a good idea.  It gives us a framework for thinking about the small details of a story we know really well.  It encourages us to ponder and look from different angles and to put ourselves in the story, using our imaginations to see past the words on the page into the reality of what was going on.  If we linger in the story we can start to smell and hear and feel the  crowds,  the upper room and Pilates courtyard.  It is not a comfortable place to be - and as the week goes on it becomes less and less comfortable until, by Friday, it is unbearable.   But the more we can immerse ourselves in Holy Week the more we can celebrate on Easter Sunday.   The more we understand and feel the pain of Sunday to Friday the deeper our appreciation of the victory Jesus has won for us, and the greater the rejoicing on Sunday.

I pray that this Easter God will do deeper things in you.  That He will show you more of what He was doing that week over 2000 years ago.  And that your rejoicing on Sunday will be more profound because of it.

Lent day 41 - clickbait

Clickbait - one of those silly new made up words we have had to invent to describe something which didn't exist five years ago.  Clickbait is what they call those adverts and quizzes and surveys which come up on the side of Facebook homepages and say things like ' 9 out of 10 people can't answer this'  or  Only the top 1% of the population get these right'.   Sometimes they look like a news article and have an attention grabbing headline.  But when you click on these things they are never quite what they seem.  They are usually just a tool to get you to look at yet more adverts or to download something or give your details. Marketing.  That's what its all about.


Knowing this, I still find myself clicking through some of these things.  Yesterday it was a Bible quiz.  9 out of 10 people cant answer these questions about books of the Bible.  Oh yeah?  I'll show em.  So I start taking the test and of course it is so very basic and the alternative answers they give are so ridiculous that it would be almost impossible NOT to get them all right.   And then we post on Facebook the fact that we have beaten the ' odds' and have proved ourselves to be the top 1% in the world at Bible knowledge even though we all really know that its a load of nonsense.

So why do we do that?  Why do we go for the bait?  The marketing companies know that we will do it - that's how they make their money and they are very good at it.  What is it that they tap into in us which they know will work and increase their chances of selling stuff to us?


Firstly they lie.  They just tell us what they think we want to hear to reel us in.   They look credible and sound credible and we all know that you can fool some of the people some of the time....

Secondly they tap into our pride.  They tell us that you have to be really bright and smart and clever to beat the odds on this test/quiz/survey.  And of course we all want to be bright and smart and clever.  Answering all the questions correctly makes us feel good - even when we know the whole thing is a load of nonsense.

Then they tap into our sense of competition.  We can do better than most.  We want to win. It is a powerful urge in many of us.

As I was thinking about this yesterday I started wondering what the Church's clickbait is.  Both literally and metaphorically.  In a social media obsessed, technology driven society the church needs to have an online presence every bit as powerful and attractive as everything else that's out there - if not more so. Let's face it, we are 'selling' community, family, life changing encounter, help hope and healing.  What we have is true.  It doesn't promise what it can't deliver.  And it is not a competition. If we can't get people to click on that then we need to change the marketing department!

Except that we are not out to compete with what the world has to offer - not really.  Because what we have doesn't compare.  It is so far above and beyond any offer anyone else could make.  However there are still huge swathes of the world who don't know anything about the life and love and hope we have found and which is free to all.  How do you and I become God's clickbait to the world round us?  How do we get people to want to spend time with us, talk to us, touch our lives in a way that moves them past our presenting headline page and gets them to our hearts?


I think the principle is the same - we need to appeal to something in people which makes them want to know more.  Jesus was the master of this.  He appealed to everyone He met. He appealed to the poor and the rich, the ruling class and servants.  He appealed to women and men,  Jews and Samaritans.  Everywhere He went people wanted to touch Him and know Him and follow Him.  He was filled full to the brim with God and with the fruits of the spirit.  Jesus was the most attractive man who has ever walked the earth .  Even though the Bible makes it clear that there was nothing in particular about His physical appearance which made Him stand out from the crowd.  He was just irresistible.   And we are too.  The more filled with godliness we are the more people will want to click on us to find out more.  (Being constantly clicked on might not always be fun but it will always be productive)

I have met a few really Christlike people in my life.  They were people who had an almost magnetic quality about them.  They were fascinating to talk to , extremely good fun, wise, kind and life changing in their ability to show me Jesus.  I want to be like that.  Im sure you do too.

lent day 40 - ladies day

Some highlights from the ladies day we hosted yesterday.

My friend Lou is not a christian.  But God is on her case - she is surrounded by christians on all sides and has just started working for Via Wings, the christian charity which put on the conference.  So she had to be there yesterday and it was the first time she had ever experienced anything like it.

I was up on the platform leading worship so I could see during the singing that Lou was a bit bewildered.  She didnt know any of the songs for a start - but over lunch she told me that she had spent the whole day wanting to burst into tears.  What was that about?   Then during the afternoon session the speaker had words of knowledge for people in the meeting.  Lou was sitting beside her very good ( christian) friend.  And the speaker had a word of knowledge for her friend.  Lou turned to said friend and asked her when she had been chatting to the speaker - assuming that they must have met.  Friend said she had never met or spoken to her,  it was God.   Lou was more and more perplexed and amazed.  How could that woman have known those things?  What was going on?

Don't you love seeing God in action?

So that was one fun thing that was going on yesterday.

Another thing that happened was in direct response to my blog post yesterday........ the one about perfectionism and attention to detail.   Sitting at lunch a young woman came to sit down next to me with her friend and they were chatting.  I overheard her saying to her friend how lovely it was that everything about the day was so nicely done and that there was such great attention to detail.  I smiled.   It was just God having a laugh at me.  See Caz, the details do matter and people do notice and are blessed.   Yeah yeah Lord, I get it.  Very funny.



The serious part of the day yesterday was the testimony given by two young women that the charity has helped in the past year.   One is a young mother of four children whose husband was diagnosed with an incurable brain tumour a year ago.  Their wedding had been planned for summer 2018, but his diagnosis meant that if they were going to get married it needed to be sooner rather than later.  So at last year's ladies day an offering was taken and the word went out that everything would be needed in order to put on a wedding in 12 weeks.  The women attending ladies day rose to the challenge. Cars and flowers and a cake and a dress - the whole works were provided by a community ,  many of whom who had never met this couple but had heard the story and wanted to help.   Via Wings team put on the reception and yesterday we heard about the wonderful wedding day they had had last summer and how grateful and glad the couple were that they had wedding pictures and memories of a happy day before illness really started to take hold and things became a lot more difficult.

The second story was of a young life ravaged by alcoholic parenting, neglect, abuse and tragedy.  The upshot was a 26 year old woman who found herself pregnant and homeless with nobody in the world to help or care for her.  She was eventually offered a house but was so fearful and depressed that she slept on the sofa and was pretty much living in squalor when she came across the door of Via Wings.   A bit of tough love and a lot of tins of paint, furniture, washing machine, organising and tidying later and she has turned her life around.  Her baby is healthy and safe and adorable.  She is motivated to keep her lovely home clean and tidy and is now proud to invite people round.  She has made new friends and even better has discovered the confidence to stand in front of a room full of strangers and tell her story in a powerful and self assured manner which was completely impressive. It is shocking to know that in the UK in this day and age children can still be having the experiences that this young woman had had.  But it is also massively heartening to see that with love and practical help and trusting relationships a life like that can be totally redeemed and restored.  She has seen God's care in what has been done for her and is now telling other people that the God she thought had abandoned her was in fact just waiting for her to turn to Him.  Inspiring stuff

So the moral of the story today is that it is possible to make a difference.  If you give money to a good cause you are making a difference.  If you listen to God and give a word of knowledge to someone you are making a difference.  If you line up the knives and forks with the napkins on the table you are making a difference.  If you pray for people who are having a horrible time you are making a difference.  And if you roll up your sleeves to paint or wallpaper or shift furniture for someone you are making a difference too.  Sometimes it is hard to believe that the little bit we do really matters - but it does.  Your piece of the puzzle might only be a small piece but it is needed to complete the picture God is painting in someone else's life.  So go for it.  Make a difference.

Lent day 39 - personality

Yesterday I spent all day helping to organise a ladies day conference which is happening today.  Eight hours of setting out tables and printing off bits and pieces and putting up wall displays and the like.  It is amazing how much time and effort it takes to set up a room for 120 people, sort out the signs for the toilets, the bookstalls, the table decorations for lunch, the volunteer rota so everyone knows what they are supposed to be doing on the day - the name badges, the money . the thank you gifts etc etc etc.   You think you are just going to invite someone to come and speak to a bunch of women and have lunch together and then you start to think about the details and the thing takes on a life all of its own!

Yesterday I realised that my personality is very different from that of most of my team mates.  I seem to be surrounded by people who are a bit OCD ( their words not mine).  Detail people. People who deeply care about the colour of the table cloths and whether the right font is being used on the menu cards.  I am so not like that.   The thing is, I think that quite alot of the attention to detail is absolutely unnecessary and a bit ridiculous.    But of course I have to realise that the detail people probably think my ' that will do' manner is exceedingly annoying and slapdash. 

Which of us is right?


Is there a right?  Does it really matter?

Why am I so different from my team mates?

What does Jesus think?  Is He a perfectionist or a 'just get the job done' guy?

I suppose the world probably needs both sort of people in order to function.  If everyone on the planet was a perfectionist and a detail person then it would take a very long time to get anything done.  If everyone was like me then lots of things would get done in pretty good time but probably wouldnt be done terribly well and might have to be done again later.   It's funny that God didnt seem to make everyone ' middle of the road' people.  We dont all have middle of the road tempers and middle sized appetites and exactly average levels of ambition.  We seem to be created to be all or nothing. One thing or the other.  Introvert or extrovert.  Tidy or messy. Organised or chaotic.  Confident or timid.  The potential for conflict is huge but maybe that is why God designed us all to be so different from each other .  Because where conflict is a possibility the need for grace is paramount.

I needed grace yesterday when I was watching people fiddling over tiny details of things I considered to be spectacularly unimportant.   Im sure they needed grace for me too :)   At the end of the day the conference was set up to a very high standard.  Higher than needed ( from my point of view)  Not as perfect as it could have been ( from theirs)  What stopped us all coming to blows and losing the plot despite everyone being very tired by the end of the day was fact that we knew we were there to bless the people who are coming to the event today.  We all had the same end goal.  And we all pulled together using our various gifts talents and personalities to get there.    I doubt I will ever be a perfectionist, but working alongside a few perfectionists makes me realise that I could improve a bit in my attention to detail.  Taking care of the small stuff shows people you are trustworthy to take care of the big stuff.

Maybe tomorrows blog will be about how todays conference went and what God did.  I do hope He uses all the thoughtful gestures and creative ideas which have gone into the day to bless people and make them feel loved.

Because at the end of the day, that's what it's all about isnt it? :)

Lent day 38 - relentless

I think you can tell if your friends are really close friends because the really close ones introduce you to their parents and other family members.  You are included in on birthdays and celebrations and you end up being friends with the family as well as friends with the friends!   I hope you have friendships like that.  I do

One of those close friends messaged me yesterday to say that his father had just died.   And I knew his father because we had all socialised together on various happy occasions when Keith and I and the boys had been over visiting our friends and their parents had been there.  In fact, our family had been invited over to the parents house for lunch on a couple of occasions, and we had invited them all over to us too.  So although we were not technically good friends with the parents, we did know them and like them and enjoy their company.  So today we are feeling sad on two counts,  sad for our friends who have lost their dad/father-in-law/grandad.  And sad for the wife/mum/grandma who has lost her husband.  That will be the fourth funeral to go to since the new year.  What is going on??

Yesterday I was praying with my prayer triplet.  Once of them was updating us on a litany of difficulties and troubles about which we have been praying over several months.  Health problems, financial pressures, a daughter being bullied at work and a son who has just lost his job, a granddaughter who is stressed because of family issues..... and so the list goes on.  Why does it seem that sometimes, some people, just get a relentless stream of rubbish thrown at them?   Why has this year for me just been one long round of people dying?  Why do we seem to go through seasons when we just want to stop the world and get off?

                                     

I offer no answers to these questions.  I have no profound words of wisdom.   All I know is that it happens to us all.  Thankfully it doesnt happen to us all at the same time - so for every one of us who is going through a relentless season there will be others who are in the sunny uplands and doing fine.   And I know from experience that one of the only things which can help us through the relentless days is the prayer support, care and concern of those around us.   Often there is nothing much to be done except hunker down and get on with it.  But knowing someone is beside us holding up our hands in the battle can be a strength and a comfort.   The sunny uplanders might feel a bit helpless looking on as the battlers battle away - but battlers need to know that there are people who have come through their battles and are still standing.  Uplanders can recognise and be thankful that God has pulled them through and cheer with encouragement from the sidelines, speaking hope and giving testimony to God's faithfulness.    This is one of the many reasons we can't do Christianity without church.   A solitary and isolated faith cant stand under a relentless wave of attack.  But together we can hold each other up, protect and shield each other and bind each others wounds. 

In the days of relentless negativity look up to Jesus and reach out to those He has put around you.  You can win the battle if there are people on each side of you holding up your hands.

Lent day 37 - unexpected answers ( testimony)

Are you sitting comfortably?  Then I'll begin

Six months ago I embarked on a course at church.  Once a month on a Saturday a bunch of us have been getting together to look at making everyday life more extraordinary as we walk with Jesus.  At the start of the course we were all encouraged to think of something we really wanted God to do for or in or through us - and it had to be something which was really going to stretch us out of the old comfort zones.   They called it our ' impossibility dream' - a kind of ' what if ?' thing.   What if I had all the resources and time in the world at my disposal and there were no obstacles in my way..... then what would I really really want to be doing for God?

                                   
There is a dentist in our group.  His impossibility dream is to be able to provide free reconstructive dental surgery to women who have been victims of domestic violence.   Isn't that cool?  It is impossible for him right now because his business just cant afford to subsidise the very great costs of the treatments.  But that doesn't mean it's impossible for God.   He has started to pray and believe that God is the God of the impossible and that just maybe his dream could become a reality.

Lots of other people in the group have unsaved family members, or broken and estranged relationships as their impossibility goals.   One young woman is the only christian in her workplace which is a very crude and worldly place to work.  Her dream is to be able to be herself at work, to let her colleagues know she has a faith and to start some conversations.  In a hard drinking, loud swearing, badly behaving culture this seems impossible.  But she believes God can change things.  She just doesn't quite know how or when He is going to start.

My impossibility dream was to do with my memory.   It has always been terrible but in the past two or three years it seems to have got worse.   I have started to have huge gaps and blanks.  It came to a head when I was in the car one afternoon with the boys and for a scary few minutes suddenly forgot which side of the road I should have been driving on!   eeeeek   So I went to the GP who put me on thyroxine for underactive thyroid.  And that does seem to have helped a bit..... but I was still pretty sure I was starting with alzheimers or dementia.  So I made my impossibility dream that God would heal my memory.

The course we are on is all about us being partners with God in what He is doing in our everyday lives.  So as part of the impossibility dream thing we had to write down the dream and then write down some steps we might be able to take to start to make it happen - alongside praying for the dream and sharing it with others on the course so that they could pray too.
I decided that I was going to get my memory prayed for as much as possible.  So on my monthly worship leading session at the healing service in Belfast I made a bee line for the ministry team to ask for prayer.   But what happened was rather odd.   Because despite asking for prayer for my memory what the prayer team actually said was ' no, we aren't going to pray for that.  We are going to pray that you stop worrying about it.'     I was a bit annoyed.  a) Id asked them to pray and they hadn't really prayed and b) I wasn't worrying about it and they had told me I was!!    However, I was aware that God might have been trying to tell me something - so I went away a bit perplexed not knowing quite what to think

That was before Christmas.  Since then I've got a new job and gone from working two mornings a week with Jo Jingles to working four days a week and I suddenly find that I'm really really busy.  Not just physically, but busy in my head.  With lots and lots of stuff to remember.

On Monday I was at Gladys's funeral and a really odd thing happened.  One of Gladys's elderly friends, who I have met a couple of times before, came up to say hello to me.  And having said hello she suddenly launched into this story about how she had been really worried for over a year that she was developing alzheimers.  She had gone to her GP and the GP had told her to stop thinking about it.  So she had taken his advice and had stopped thinking about it.  And now she was feeling much better and she wasn't worried about her memory any more.   As she was talking to me I was simultaneously thinking ' why are you talking to me about this?  This is a really random conversation to be having at someones funeral with someone you barely know'   and at the same time I was thinking ' this is so weird it must be God.  She knows nothing at all about me and my memory.  I need to listen to this'

I came away from the funeral having reached the conclusion that God had told me twice that I don't have alzheimers or early onset dementia and that if I stop thinking about it and get on with being busy then my memory will sort itself out.    This was not the answer to prayer I had been anticipating.  Not at all.   But funnily enough at the start of the course I had written down that I was giving God till March  ( when the course ends - it actually finishes this Saturday) to do something about my memory.  If He hadn't done anything then I was going back to the GP to ask for more thorough tests.
It is the end of March - and what God seems to have done is not to have answered my prayers to improve and heal my terrible memory.  But instead He has reassured me that the key is to hand it over to Him and get on with doing life.   So that's what I'm going to do.  I'm going to keep busy, not think about my memory and see if, just like Gladys's friend, in a year's time I can testify to the fact that I dont have a problem with my memory any more.

Lent day 36 - happiness

At what point in the history of the culture of the western world did the pursuit of happiness become a religion?  I'm pretty sure it was not always thus. 

What is it that makes you happy?

A big piece of chocolate cake?
A hug from a much loved friend?
A piece of music which makes your toes tap or brings back precious memories?
Your children/parents/spouse/friends/dog?
A sunset or sunrise
Having enough money in the bank to be able to pay the bills
Your favourite film
Being snuggled in bed on a snow day when you should be at work.

It is all a bit...... flimsy ..... isn't it?   I mean, there is nothing wrong with any of those things, they are all fine and good and positive.  But they are pretty much all about how we feel.  And feeling ' good' seems to have become the end goal of most of our lives.   We are supposed to feel good about our jobs.  Feel satisfied and fulfilled and ' happy'.   We are supposed to feel good about ourselves - be healthy and fit and slim and gorgeous.  We are supposed to be happy in our relationships - being unhappy is a good excuse to remove ourselves and look for a new relationship.

Jesus had a completely different list of what it is that constitutes happiness


As far as I understand the beatitudes, what this really means is that I can be living in a war zone, have no money, be unwell, have no friends and no happy endings but still be living a blessed life.  Being blessed is not the same thing as being happy - although it is often translated as meaning the same thing.  Being blessed is a whole heap more than simply feeling happy.  It is knowing the favour of almighty God.  Having His protection, love, peace and wisdom covering your life.  It is having the Word dwelling in you richly and knowing a spring of life gently bubbling up in your spirit all the time, regardless of the circumstances or how you feel about them.

Jesus says that we can be blessed when we are mourning.  When we are persecuted.  He doesnt expect us to be happy in those situations - that would be perverse.  We can be sad, grieving, fearful, angry, but still blessed.   It is a mystery isn't it?

The world is missing out when it holds out happiness to people as the be all and end all.  It leads to a deeply unsatisfied community of people who are always comparing themselves to unrealistic and unattainable ideals of happiness  ( Walt Disney and Hollywood have a lot to answer for!)  The reality is that happiness can punctuate our lives and we are deeply grateful when it does.  But mere happiness is not what God has for us.  He wants to go so much deeper than just fleeting feelings.   He wants us to experience  JOY.     We need to seek blessing rather than happiness ( the two things are by no means mutually exclusive) because it is only when we are living in the presence and favour of God that there is fullness of joy.  And the joy of the Lord ( notice it is not our joy but His, nothing to do with our feelings but a spiritual impartation from Him) is our strength. 

Relying on and listening to our own feelings is not the answer.  The heart is deceitful  above all else, and desperately wicked ,who can know it? ( Jer 17.9)   So if you are feeling unhappy...... perhaps its time to stop listening to your feelings and start counting your blessings instead.   There is a reason why people used to do that you know.  It's because it works!

Lent day 35 - inheritance

Heard two things yesterday.  One was my friend Bryan talking about his Mum Gladys at her funeral.  Bryan is a general in God's army.  He has authority, humility and lives a life more submitted to God than probably anyone I know.  He lives by faith as a missionary and has daily stories about how God has looked after his every need and made a way for him through seeming impossibilities.  Im privileged to call him a friend.   But the reason Bryan is the man that he is is because he had the mother that he had.  ( And quite probably the Father, but his dad died a long time ago and I never knew him)   Bryan had a mother who prayed for him, believed in him, discipled him and loved him.  When Gladys died she had next to no earthly possessions.  I know because I helped to clear out her room and her entire life fit into a couple of bin bags and boxes.   But what she left behind was a son who has won hundreds and hundreds of people for Jesus and who sees miracles on a regular basis as he goes into unreached places to tell people about God.   Bryan has not inherited anything physical from his mother except her wedding ring, her Bible and some very old fashioned prints of landscapes and a lady from Ghana carrying a baby on her back!   But his spiritual inheritance is immense.   Today I am feeling seriously challenged to pray much more for my kids. 

Then on the radio coming home from Gladys's funeral I was listening to a lady talking about her father who had been an exile from Franco's Spain.  She said ' I inherited fear'.   Wow.  What a statement.  She recognised that because her father had lived in fear in Spain and then left Spain in fear and lived in fear in exile, she had inherited fear.   Despite the fact that she was English and the Spanish Civil war has been over for a generation, she still knew that fear was in her DNA because it had been transmitted to her by her father.

What have you inherited?

If you are blessed to have had praying parents or grandparents you have probably inherited godliness and strength.  You are incredibly fortunate if that is the case and I do hope you are making the most of every blessing that has passed down your family line and are building on them for the next generation.   DO NOT squander the spiritual legacy which has been handed down to you.  You have a responsibility to take the baton and run further with it than your predecessors did.

But perhaps you have inherited something not so Godly?  If your family is hallmarked by anxiety or chronic illness, by financial disasters or persistent relationship breakdown......  well maybe you have inherited a curse instead of a blessing.   Good News!  Jesus became a curse for us when he hung on that cross at Calvary so that you can be released from that nasty inheritance.   And more Good News - you can be the start of a whole new line going forward.   Even if you dont have children of your own you can still pray for and invest in the next generation , growing generals for the future.

                         
 

Lent 34 - miracles

Eighteen years ago today I was about to miss a flight to my honeymoon safari to Kenya because we went to the wrong airport !  I'm pretty sure the first day of married life shouldn't be as stressful as ours turned out to be ( thanks to the lovely people at KLM airlines we did make it to our destination on time - but only just) but perhaps it was fitting; because the rest of married life has turned out to be pretty stressful too.

For those of you who know me well you will understand it when I say that the fact that Keith and I are still married after 18 years is a miracle.  I'm not being flippant or funny.  It truly is. For us marriage has been the most uncomfortable, difficult, stressful thing either of us have ever done.  It didn't help that I was 34 and Keith was 35 when we married....... so we had plenty of single person bad habits to try to shake off and were both well set in our ways.  If it hadn't been for the fact that God quite clearly spoke to us both in different ways when we met we very probably would not have stuck it out.    Before we met face to face for the first time I had a very significant dream in which God was holding my hand and giving me specific instructions about what the upcoming meeting was to look like.  The dream ( I can still see every detail of it now in my minds eye) kept me in check over the first few weeks of the relationship and helped me to keep a focus on what God had said.  Then when we got engaged, someone in church had a picture for us both.  In the picture Keith and I were coming down from mountain tops on opposite sides of a valley and meeting down in the valley at the bottom.  The word said that we were going to walk through a valley and it would be hard, but if we kept together and kept going forward eventually we would come out of the valley into open pasture.    Not exactly the joyous promise anyone wants on their engagement day!  But that word and the dream have been all that have held me in this marriage at times.   Those things, and the promises I made on my wedding day.

We have been through some very unhappy times - not helped in the slightest by the depression I suffered for years after the boys were born.  We tried counselling but it didn't really work for us because ...... well, for lots of reasons.  Friends worried about us and some of mine talked to me about the possibility of leaving.   But leaving was never an option - because despite it all God has been here in the middle of it.   Even in the midst of deep unhappiness, loneliness and stress there can be a peace which bypasses logic and is like an anchor.  It is hard to explain, but when I made a promise to Keith in front of God to be married to him until one of us dies, I meant it.  And God sealed that promise and has helped me to keep it.  And that is what is the miracle.


Over the past years God has been working on me.  He has answered some of my difficult questions and set to rest some unresolved issues from the past.  He has allowed me an insight into what my life might have looked like if I hadn't married Keith - and funnily enough, I didn't really fancy it after all!  Despite all the difficulties I still think that we were supposed to be married and that God is in this.  Its been hard to see why sometimes.  And without a shadow of a doubt we could have done a better job of it.  But there you have it.  Life is tricky and nobody is perfect.

For the past ten years or so I have not celebrated my wedding anniversary in any way, preferring just to ignore the day rather than have to either pretend or lie that I was in any way rejoicing in my wedded bliss.  But this year I sense that something has come to an end.  A season is over.  Perhaps we are nearing the end of the valley and the pasture is in sight.  I can't pretend that everything is perfect and joyful, but a time of grieving is definitely over.  God says he has the oil of joy for mourning and a spirit of praise instead of heaviness.  I choose to believe that joy and praise might yet be seen in our marriage.  It will take more miracles.  But we believe in miracles.

It is incredibly hard for Christian couples to talk about their relationships if they are not going well.  Somehow we all feel we have to be perfect.  We look at other people and think they are perfect and we are the only ones struggling.  We feel that we will be betraying our partner if we mention how they drive us round the bend or snore or don't want sex or are financially unreliable or are having an affair or are looking at porn or are too engrossed in work or are unreasonable or unkind.  I'm not sure what we can do about that.  Because its even harder to talk about marriages than it is to talk about mental health - and that's hard enough!  But if you are in a tough spot just now, or have been in a tough marriage for a long time then just remember that nothing lasts forever, especially not feelings.  Miracles can and do happen.   You can do this.  God will help you but perhaps not in ways you might want Him to.  Keep your eyes on the prize. And if you possibly can, then talk to someone about it.  You might be surprised to find that you are not the only one having a hard time.  Our enemy hates marriage and will do all he can to destroy it and wipe out families.  God is fighting for you and Jesus is praying for you.  Work on being the best version of you you can possibly be and don't listen to the voices shouting at you to quit.  If God joined you together then He has a purpose in you being together and an investment in keeping you together.   Hang on in there.  I for one am cheering for you x

Lent day 33 - creativity

Was at a craft fair yesterday.  It was quite a big one and there were all sorts of things on display.  People had been painting, felting, knitting, embroidering, making cards, jewellery, candles, soaps, taking photographs, doing calligraphy...... it was all very inspiring.   The craft fair was put on by a large church in Belfast which has a history of supporting the arts.  The money they raised was being sent to missions.  Quite a few of the stalls were selling things either made by, or in support of, overseas projects.   The stall next to me was selling lovely needlework made by ladies in India and all the profits went back to their business to help lift them out of poverty.  I love the fact that faith and creativity can combine to combat social inequality and injustice.

The arts have always had the power to lift people.  Not just out of poverty in a really practical way, but lift spirits and hearts.  I suppose I've always been creative - I come from a musical family and we were always good with words, telling stories and writing.   But I came to painting and other crafty stuff really late - I was in my 40s before it occurred to me to even have a go.

I have found the very act of making things to be both incredibly therapeutic - you really cant think about anything else when you are painting a picture - and satisfying.  It is really very wonderful to start with a blank page and end with something you have created which wasn't there before.   Imagine how God felt when He started with a swirling nothingness and began to create life.  You don't have to be good at it.  That's not the point.  Beauty really and honestly is in the eye of the beholder.  What you consider to be a daub or a scribble someone else is guaranteed to think is great.  Why?  Because art speaks in the same way God speaks.   It whispers to people's hearts in unique ways.  That is why two people looking at the same painting can react in utterly opposing ways.   It's why a canvas painted black can be considered a work of genius by some and a waste of time by others.  Or an unmade bed.  Or a shark in a tank.   Or your doodle on the back of an envelope  😊

There's something else about being creative...... it's like a conversation.  You can paint or draw or knit or decoupage or marble or bake in order to express how you are feeling, but then what you have made can connect with someone else to help them express how they are feeling.  And if you connect to God as you are creating then He gets to connect with people through your creativity.

I don't need to tell you how creative God is.  You just need to look around you.   But maybe I do need to tell you how creative you are.  You are made in the image of the one who paints the sunsets and made the flowers.  And if His spirit lives in you then you have access to every imagining and thought in the super creative mind of God.  What to do about that?  I think all you need to do is invite God to open you to the potential of being creative and then step back and see where He leads you.  You might be surprised where you end up.

     

Lent day 32 - feedback

I started a new job after Christmas - moving from volunteering for a local charity Via Wings, to working two and a half days a week in the office doing fundraising and marketing and stuff.   I'm enjoying the brain stretch and the new people and being back in an office team environment after many years.

Over the past couple of weeks I've heard a few things that have made me smile about how people who really don't know me very well perceive me.   I've been told that I'm a positive person.  That's nice.  I have been complimented on the fact that I can take critique and don't mind having my creative ideas tweaked and altered.  I have been thanked for smiling!!  And today I got laughed at because I threw a minor strop when my computer cable got caught in a pile of stuff and sent things flying down the hallway.  Apparently it is uncharacteristic of me to strop.   Ha!  If only they knew!!😁

If you remember a couple of weeks ago I talked about the funeral I was at and suggested that we all take time to tell people who mean alot to us exactly how they bless us?   Well, I decided to put my money where my mouth is and wrote a few cards to a few people listing the ways in which they bless me.   So far I've managed to deliver four of them secretly  ( I really don't want to be there when people read them)   All of them have blessed the recipients far and above the way I thought they might.  Sometimes people really really need to hear some positives.

We are really good at negative feedback in our culture.  We like a good moan and we are happy to write to the papers or give off on Facebook when someone upsets us.  But how often do we sing the praises of people who have gone the extra mile, been kind, done a really good job?   My friend John recently got dug out of a snowdrift by a passing Morrison's van driver who actually left, went for help and came back to him before heading off on his journey to deliver shopping in the snow. I suggested he should contact Morrisons and let them know.    Last year I stupidly left my handbag ( purse , camera, and all) in a hire car at Luton airport.  The guy on the phone was SO helpful, they got the bag and posted it back to me first class and didnt charge me for it.  The only thing they asked was would I leave positive feedback on their website.   I left glowing commendations and then received an email from the boss of Europcar in Luton thanking me and saying she was going to print my feedback and put it on the staff noticeboard because it was so nice for her staff to get praise.

It really doesn't take much to make someone's day.  Pointing out peoples strengths instead of their weaknesses, taking care to say thank you and mean it, recognising effort and being grateful for kindness, excellence and thoughtfulness.   Today I challenge you take notice of the people who are serving you and let them know that you appreciate it.  The person serving you coffee or in a shop, your boss at work, your spouse bringing you a cup of tea, your pastor or worship team or sound desk guy.... they all are mostly taken for granted.  Wouldnt it be nice to bless them today?

                                                               

Lent day 31 = blessing

I saw this yesterday and instantly found my spirit coming to a place of peace and gratitude.  So I thought I'd share it with you because it truly is a lovely way to start the day.  5mins long.  Enjoy

https://www.facebook.com/ContemplativeMonk/videos/1555970047785572/

Lent day 30 - fathers

On mother's day I was talking to a good friend of mine about my blog post on that self same subject and she happened to mention that her husband didn't like mother's day because he thought it was unfair that mothers got lots of fuss in church when fathers. who are every bit as important, are largely overlooked on their day.   And he is right isn't he?  Loads of churches make a big deal of mothers - in the church I was in that Sunday ( which wasn't my own church as I was helping out with worship somewhere else) I was handed a pot plant as I left.  I don't think I can recall many father's days when Dads have been given gifts on the way out.

So in these days of equality I think I had better redress the balance and write a post in praise of Dads.  :)

Dads are super important people.   We were designed to have fathers, because God is the ultimate Father and He longs to show us what He is like through the relationships He places in our lives.   I'm not sure I can adequately explain the difference between ' mothering' and 'fathering', but I believe there is a difference.  It has nothing to do with roles and characteristics.  I firmly believe that a Dad can change nappies and stay at home and look after babies just as a Mum can wrestle teenage boys to the floor and teach them to drive.  And both can bring an equal amount of love to a child.   Fathering  is a spiritual thing.   It is about inheritance and authority.  And about representing the heart of the Father in the family.

So to all you Dads out there - I salute you.

To the work worn, over committed, exhausted Dads who feel guilty at not spending enough time with the kids - thank you for all your hard work and dedication.  As long as they know you love them that will be enough .  Because love covers over a multitude of things that we can't cover ourselves.

To the Dads who are also Mums because they are caring on their own.  Bravo!  Well done, it must be super hard.  I pray you get the help you need and are able to take it when its offered.  I pray for friends and a social life and enough money to meet your needs.

To the Dads of boys and the Dads of girls, the the fathers of twins and triplets and those whose kids have difficulties and health needs : you have your hands full but you are doing a great job.  I pray that your marriages and relationships are strong and healthy and that you can enjoy every moment of being a parent to those precious ones.

To the men who have longed to be Fathers but can't be.  You can be overlooked and your pain can go unexpressed.  Please know that God sees you and understands.  There is peace and it is possible to find it.  Or to allow it to find you.  Fathering isnt only biological.  The church needs spiritual fathers and the world needs to know the expressions of a fathers heart reaching out in love and faithfulness

To the fathers who have lost their children, through separation and divorce, death or distance, estrangement or any other means - I am so sorry , it is very hard.  May you know the comfort of the Holy Spirit and the hope of the God of the prodigals.

To grandfathers who are enjoying parenting all over again at a distance - bless you for your wisdom and insight, for your care and your fun.  May your grandfathering bring you huge amounts of joy and may your family relationships strengthen and deepen over the years.

And to those of you who have had a difficult relationship with your own fathers - may God bless you so much that forgiveness and kindness and love flow out of you into the broken places.  May past hurts be erased and first steps of reconciliation be taken where at all possible

You men probably don't get told often enough how great you are.  Our boys and young men look up to so many of you and want to be who you are.  Our girls and young women watch how you treat your wives and sisters and mothers and friends and build their expectations for the future around the example you set.  In a world which sends out so many warped and mixed messages about identity and gender and roles and responsibilities you guys are the real deal.  It can't be easy.  Thank you for being you and holding true to the man God has called you to be.

May you get flowers on Father's day and all the appreciation you deserve .
                                                       

Lent day 29 - floods

On the principle of better late than never Im posting the blog at the eleventh hour ( literally) today.  Apologies.  I hit the ground running at half seven this morning and have only just stopped running now - Ive just had no time at all to sit and write this until now.   So here you have it.  I shall keep it short and sweet.

It rained today.  All day.  Quite hard.   By 5.30pm when I was taking Ben to his guitar lesson the river in the village was up to the top of the bridge and the fields were flooded.   The drive to the lesson takes us along the ridge of a hill where a small stream runs in the valley down to the left.   It is usually a thin ribbon of water meandering slowly through the farmland.  This afternoon  it just looked like an large inland lake had always been there.

I was thinking about how quickly land can flood.  Yesterday the sheep had grass on which to graze and after seven or eight hours of rain the fields are properly flooded .  And as that thought flitted across my brain so did this one.                                                                                                                     

The thing that struck me was the speed at which the waters can rise.  It is staggering - and of course it is why it is so difficult for people to plan for floods.  And why floods do so much damage.

Yesterday I was reading something Paul Cain had prophesied .  He said this

Seems good to me that you are going to see some things that will leave some of you without words for days, there is a resurgence of the fear of the Lord coming, and it will fall suddenly, unexpectedly and unannounced. A new day is coming, it is not an encore - this will be like no other .

This will be a hallmark of a huge wave of the Spirit that will sweep around the earth. It will be about holiness and purity of heart, and it is a waste of time telling folk to get ready. It will just come. Suddenly. A revival with a hallmark of tears, but also profound intimacy with the person of the Holy Spirit.

Suddenly.  That's the word.  Suddenly like a flood He will come and we will know His glory.

Come Holy Spirit!

Lent day 28 - rescuers

Over the past couple of weeks I have seen several television programmes or films about lifeboats for some reason.  I can't say that I give the work of the RNLI much thought on a daily basis, but watching a fly on the wall documentary about them the other day left me amazed and full of admiration.  Such brave and selfless individuals.  Quite literally dealing with life and death issues every day.

It must take a special sort of person to volunteer to do a job like that.  I suppose in some ways it is a bit like being a soldier..... when you sign up you know that you stand a fairly good chance of being in physical danger, being wounded or even killed.   Except that lifeboat crew dont get paid and soliders do.   Lifeboat crew all have jobs and do their rescue work in their spare time.  So do mountain rescuers.  And some lifeguards and coastguards.   It never ceases to amaze me that people will sacrifice their time and energy and put themselves in the way of danger in order to help and rescue complete strangers, many of whom have been stupid and selfishly got themselves into trouble.   And what about our amazing fire service?  I think going into the sea and going into a burning building hold equal amounts of dread and terror for me.  Im pretty sure I couldnt do it.  But thousands of brave and selfless people do.

We dont think about our emergency services until an emergency happens and we need them.  Then we expect them to be there for us,  possibly putting themselves in danger on our behalf.  We yell for rescue and it comes .   The butcher and the baker and the dressmaker drop everything and rush to our aid.   And lots of us think about God in the same way.  We don't pay too much attention until something happens and we realise we need some help. And like the lifeboat team,  Jesus, the angels and the Holy Spirit come to our rescue.  They don't have to do that for us, but they do.

One day I am going to have a new body and I really hope that I will also get a new brain and a new memory too.  In heaven I'm going to make sure I keep a look out for all those people who have bravely and selflessly dedicated their lives to risky rescues.  I suspect they might be sitting somewhere up front in seats marked ' Reserved - greater love has no man than this, that he lays down his life for his friends'  right next to Jesus, the author and perfector of the risky rescue :)

lent 27 Storms

Jonah Flees From the Lord

1 The word of the Lord came to Jonah son of Amittai: 2 “Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me.” 3 But Jonah ran away from the Lord and headed for Tarshish. He went down to Joppa, where he found a ship bound for that port. After paying the fare, he went aboard and sailed for Tarshish to flee from the Lord.

4 Then the Lord sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up. 5 All the sailors were afraid and each cried out to his own god. And they threw the cargo into the sea to lighten the ship. But Jonah had gone below deck, where he lay down and fell into a deep sleep.6 The captain went to him and said, “How can you sleep? Get up and call on your god! Maybe he will take notice of us so that we will not perish.”

7 Then the sailors said to each other, “Come, let us cast lots to find out who is responsible for this calamity.” They cast lots and the lot fell on Jonah. 8 So they asked him, “Tell us, who is responsible for making all this trouble for us? What kind of work do you do? Where do you come from? What is your country? From what people are you?” 9 He answered, “I am a Hebrew and I worship the Lord, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the dry land.”

10 This terrified them and they asked, “What have you done?” (They knew he was running away from the Lord, because he had already told them so.)  11 The sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked him, “What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?”  12 “Pick me up and throw me into the sea,” he replied, “and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you.”

13 Instead, the men did their best to row back to land. But they could not, for the sea grew even wilder than before. 14 Then they cried out to the Lord, “Please, Lord, do not let us die for taking this man’s life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you, Lord, have done as you pleased.” 15 Then they took Jonah and threw him overboard, and the raging sea grew calm. 16 At this the men greatly feared the Lord, and they offered a sacrifice to the Lord and made vows to him.  17 Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

Everyone knows the story.  Hard to find something new to say about it.   But today as I read it again I was thinking about another boat.  Another storm.  Another man in a deep sleep whilst those sailing the boat were in a panic and sure they were going to die.     Funny how the Bible has threads running through it and how Jesus ties them all up so that there is one consistent narrative spanning the whole of human history.   The usual comparison between Jonah and Jesus is the three days thing.   Belly of the fish, days in the tomb, brought back to life etc etc.

But that's not what stands out to me today. 

Jonah and Jesus are both on a mission from God to tell people that they need to repent and turn to Him in order to be saved.  Jonah bottles out and runs, Jesus embraces the task in complete obedience.  They both end up in a storm though.   Jesus's obedience did not guarantee Him a smooth ride.  He faced exactly the same circumstances that Jonahs disobedience caused him.  That hardly seems fair does it?   I mean, you can understand that God is mad at Jonah for running away and not doing what he has been told to do.  A storm seems like a good way of dealing with Jonah - of getting his attention and then getting him back to the place he needed to be, repentant, ready to fulfill the calling.    But Jesus had done nothing wrong.  He wasnt running away.  He was faithfully carrying out God's purposes.  And He still ended up in a storm!

Sometimes we can look at what is going on around us and it just doesnt make sense.   We are sure we are doing what we are supposed to be doing.  We pray and read and fellowship.  We tithe and worship and confess our sins.  We put our trust in God and submit as far as we are able - yet we wake up one day up to our necks in water, about to drown, screeching for help surrounded by darkness......  it's not fair!

Jonah and Jesus react differently to the storms they face.   Jonah is instantly convicted of his sin.   He knows what this storm is all about.  At least he is decent enough to own up and volunteers to lose his life rather than see the ship go down with the loss of many.   That's a very noble response.  I wonder how Jonah is feeling at this point.  Wretched and terrified I would imagine.   Possibly he feels that death is a good way out of this terrible situation he has brought upon himself.   Poor Jonah.  I feel sorry for him.    Jesus, on the other hand, knows what His storm is about too.  Jesus knows that He has authority over the wind and the waves.  He knows He has an enemy who is trying to wipe Him out and that He has been given a task to complete which is not yet finished.  So He has no fear.  He has faith in His mission, in His Father and in His own authority.   He stands up and tells the storm to stop.  And it does. 

If you are in a storm at the moment how are you responding?   Is the storm there to show you that you are running away and that you need to get back on track with God?  Do you need to repent and turn around before you take other people down with you?    Or is your storm an attack of the enemy to try to divert you from the mission God has set before you?   Is it time to remind yourself about Gods promises to you and  His ability to keep those promises?  Is it time to stand in the authority God has given you in Jesus and speak to your storm?